Lou Clark knows lots of things. She knows how many footsteps there are between the bus stop and home. She knows she likes working in The Buttered Bun tea shop and she knows she might not love her boyfriend Patrick.

What Lou doesn’t know is she’s about to lose her job or that knowing what’s coming is what keeps her sane.

Will Traynor knows his motorcycle accident took away his desire to live. He knows everything feels very small and rather joyless now and he knows exactly how he’s going to put a stop to that.

What Will doesn’t know is that Lou is about to burst into his world in a riot of colour. And neither of them knows they’re going to change the other for all time.

My opinion:

This is not romance, there is no HEA. So if that is your thing turn around, but you still shouldn’t. This is fiction with romance. Is there a difference, you might wonder. Yes, there is, a huge difference. You all know that I usually tend to stay away from non HEA, well things changed a bit in the past few months, but still I prefer HEA. Making the decision to read this book was hard. I kept avoiding it, but I was too curious to pass up the opportunity to read it when it was given to me. So I did.

To be honest, I do not even know where to begin. This book woke up mixed feelings inside of me. I understand certain things and why they happened the way they did, but part of me refuses to let go. Personally, for me, knowing the ending helped considerably. So you might want to check that out first if you do not think that it is the worse thing that someone can do to a book. I usually do not check it, but this book is an exception.

Will was someone who could do anything he wished. He was successful, he was handsome, he hand the entire world at his feet until one tragic accident changed his life forever. He was forced to let everything go and become this other person and all the things he enjoyed, that made his life worth living were just a bit out of reach now. It never happened to me and I am grateful everyday that it did not, but it happened to someone very close to me. It was not the same thing as with Will, but similar.  I was close to that person, we were very similar and being there day after day I could see the struggle and and I know that I would have wanted the same thing if I had been in that situation so from this point of view I understand Will’s decision. But there is a huge difference, Will was young and he had not lived yet. He had so many reasons to keep fighting and you can hate me all you want, but in my opinion, his decision was selfish. Yes, selfish. He might have wanted to help those around him by lifting “the problem” off their shoulders, by not forcing them to sit by him and care for him for years to come, in a way that is admirable, but I honestly think it hurts more to lose someone before their time is up and forcing them to say goodbye before they are ready to let go.

Lou is a nice woman, but she is not that strong of a heroine in my opinion. Her life was always about something or someone, but never about her. She was healthy and in comparison to Will she had a long life ahead of her and she did not take advantage of that. She did not things for herself, but for others. She made changes to her life because someone else told her so which is not normal. Overall I did like her, but I felt like there was something missing.

Like I mentioned earlier I could understand Will’s decision, but not truly accept it. Hope that makes sense. Of all the things he’s done there is one I cannot forgive – pushing Lou away and the manner he did that. In his mind it might have been for the best, but I don’t think it was, for either of them. You can never take back the words you spoke and even if you try to there is always gonna be a shadow of a doubt haunting you for the rest of your life.

This book is, in my opinion, mostly about understanding and accepting. That’s the thing about love, isn’t it? It can raise you up but also destroy you. Loving someone is about wanting that someone to be happy, but what if their happiness means destroying yourself? Letting go was the hardest thing Lou had to do. It was also selfish of her trying to get Will to stay.

This book does not have a tragic ending. It is neither spectacular. It was something we expected from the very beginning, but we might have refused to accept.

One more thing. In a way I would like to read the book “Me after you” –  not that it actually exists. It is funny how one person can change our life forever. It does not matter how long we’ve known that person, or what they meant to us. Each and every person passing through our lives has the ability to change something, they leave a mark, it is just that some marks are more visible than others.

Beautifully written, this book tackles one of the most controversial topics there are and it does so graciously.  In situations like these it is hard to tell what is right and what is wrong, what is best…My review will never make this book justice, so you should better read it.

If you read just one book next year – make this the one.

From me: 5/5

Quotes I loved:

“Push yourself. Don’t Settle. Just live well. Just LIVE.”

“You only get one life. It’s actually your duty to live it as fully as possible.”

“I will never, ever regret the things I’ve done. Because most days, all you have are places in your memory that you can go to.”

“Live boldly. Push yourself. Don’t settle.”